Thursday, February 26, 2009

the one that changes...

Change. It's one of those things we just can't avoid, no matter how hard we try. Trust me--I know. I am the queen of anti-change. Just ask my mother.
My aversion to change started long ago, but it became abundantly clear two weeks before I left for London. Seriously, if I hadn't bought my ticket during the summer, I wouldn't have gone. At all. The idea of picking up and flying 3,000 miles was no longer appealing to me. And if I would have gone along with my feelings, I would have missed out on the coolest, best experience of my life. (And yes, Rachel, you are a part of that. :heart:)
Coming home from this awesome experience had a whole new batch of changes as well. A lot of the change was just getting used to things all over again, like driving, house politics and the subtle changes that took place whilst I was gone. School was a big change, but almost a bigger change was my job on campus. For the past two years, I was a work study in the college library. For obvious reasons, this suited me to a 'T'. It was the best job I think I've ever had. Why? Mostly because it was with books, but also because I was COMFORTABLE with the way things were done. Hmm... God's plans are sure not mine.
They weren't able to keep my job for me at the library, so I applied to be a writing/ literature tutor at the Learning Center. This was a last resort. I did not want this job. I was worried, but mostly because it was new and unfamiliar. I know I had small faith that God would provide, and almost hoped he would prevent me from getting this job. Instead, he saw my doubt, and decided to make me grow. Thanks God.
There must be a good point to this, or else I wouldn't be writing, right? Right. Today I had my first appointment. Um yeah. I was terrified. But in my nervousness, I found a bit of calm. I knew I knew how to write. I just had to share that with someone else... The session went well and no one died. Success? I think so. I think I was clear and got some good points across for future use. All I could think about was my conversation with Christine when I told her about my new job. "Oh, you'll be fine." She said. "It will be easy. Don't worry about it!" I doubted her then, but I hung onto those words! She was right! And (she ashamedly admits) God was right. He did provide this job for me and He had new things for me to learn. I wonder why I never remember that...
I guess all change isn't bad. Look at London. I have changed for the better since I've been there, and I'm glad for the new stuff I'm doing because of that. It's a good thing I don't do things the way I want to. I would miss so much if I didn't listen to God. Don't hop off 'the rack of change'. He doesn't pull you out of shape; He shapes you to be more like Him.
Off to bask in the joy of the rack...

3 comments:

The Dickinsons said...

I knew you could do it!! And you know what else?? It gets easier every time :)

sharon said...

ah the rack. at least we know He's not trying to kill us! job well done - Laura and God, what a team
gievat

Library said...

but we still miss you terribly, so maybe the plan will lead you back to us =) But, you certainly have a lot to offer to all those needy students, so share your talents!!